Assertiveness is a skill for effective communication and negotiation while respecting the thoughts and feelings of others. Assertive people are clear about their wants, needs, and boundaries to others and there remains no question to where they stand. Being assertive means being able to stand up for what is right, and to say no to something that does not pleases in a confident, calm, and respectful way which is neither too aggressive nor passive. It is an important personal and interpersonal skill as in all our interactions being assertive helps us to express ourselves in a clear, open, and reasonable way, without undermining our own or other’s rights.

An aggressive communication can ruin relationships for us because no one likes to be in the company of a person who constantly judges, argues, disagrees, and does not allow others to share their opinion. While a passive communication may lead to us feeling misunderstood or unheard and we may also feel that no one truly listens to us or value our input. However an assertive communication is way to present our thoughts and beliefs in a clear manner. Assertiveness is seen as a balance between aggressive and passive types of personalities.

Assertive behaviour includes –

  • Being open in expressing wishes and encouraging others to do the same
  • Listening to the views of others and responding appropriately, whether in agreement with those views or not
  • Accepting responsibilities and being able to delegate to others
  • Regularly expressing appreciation of others for what they have done or are doing
  • Being able to admit to mistakes and apologise
  • Maintaining self control
  • Behaving as an equal to others


  • Assertive people feel empowered to do whatever it takes to find the best solutions for their problems that they face.
  • They get things done by treating people with fairness and respect and are treated by others in the same way.
  • They are self assured and don’t feel threatened or upset when things don’t go as planned or as expected.
  • They are able to recognize the value of their opponent’s position and can quickly find common ground with them.
  • They are able to express themselves in a better and calm way which makes the communication effective.
  • They are confident enough to show that they are brave enough to stand up for what the resonate with as well as are in control of what they say.
  • Trust is an important part for any communication to take place and being an assertive person helps to you get their easily. 


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